Extra, Extra! Read all about it!

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newspaper   It’s hard to read all about it when your newspaper carrier only brings the paper by on a rare occasion. I know, get with the times and read your news online! I do that too. Ok, only Facebook really. So, whatever makes the headlines there is my education for the day. I may not know what is happening in the world but I can tell you the latest Kanye drama. But still, I like getting the paper (mainly for the funnies and the occasional crossword). I have paid for a subscription. What seems to be the problem?? Today I called the newspaper office for the hundredth time and I was in fact told what the problems are.

  1. It is my fault that I live on a route where few others receive a newspaper so it’s possible to get skipped due to my unacceptable location. (I live on a college campus so you figure that one out).
  2. It is also my fault that I live in an apartment building because in the dark it is hard to see the numbers. (We live on a main street right next to some very large street lights).
  3. I should not be angry I didn’t receive my paper. (This is at least the 40th time this has happened so I may have been a wee bit irritated).
  4. My missed paper cannot be re-delivered. (No explanation why).
  5. If I am lucky, I may receive a paper tomorrow but if not, I am welcome to call the office. (Sure, because that worked wonders this time).
  6. I will not be receiving any credit on my account because “These things happen”. (Of course they do but this is ignorance in excess and I am tired of paying for a paper I can’t read).
  7. If I need further assistance, I can call and talk to Lisa. (I ask, “Are you Lisa?” She said “No.”)

So there you have it, everything explained in black and white…

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The Customer Is NEVER Right…

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orange shakeHello World! I have been AWOL for a while. I admit, I was a bit discouraged pouring my heart out daily for just a handful of people. But, whether it’s for 1 person or 1 million, the show must go on. Besides, it’s not fair to punish you awesome people for being more intelligent than most and realizing greatness when you see it (or rather, read it). There is so much to rant about and I have missed my outlet. So hang with me and we will proceed on…

Where has customer service gone??! I can’t find a smidgen of it anywhere. Not even a trace. A few weeks ago, we were driving by Arby’s and I noticed on the sign they were advertising orange cream shakes. Dreamsicle Heaven! I am in! I told my daughter, “We HAVE to try those sometime!” she agreed with glee. We drove by a few more times but were busy with summertime activities. The last time by I said “We are stopping on payday for sure.” So today, here we go. As I pull into the parking lot, I notice they also have a huge sign in the front window begging us to try the tasty treat. I walk up to the counter and find two women gossiping about the latest scoop. One rolls her eyes as she comes over to help us. She opens her mouth and out comes “What do you want?” I am thinking, a proper greeting for starters. I ask her for two of those orange shakes, please. She gets this disgusted look on her face and replies with “Our shake machine is broken so you are going to have to order something else!” I don’t have to and guess what, I am not going to. I say “That’s all I wanted but thanks.” She says “Well if you want one that bad, you can drive to our other location on …, they might have them there.” I reply with “I don’t want to drive to the other side of town but thanks anyway.” She continues on with “That’s the only way you are going to get one!” I end the conversation with “No worries, I won’t be going there or here anytime in the near future. Have a nice day.” Her jaw dropped open and I left the store. What about saying something like I’m sorry we don’t have those today or suggesting something else or giving me a coupon for a free sandwich. Or, at the very least, TAKE DOWN THE HUGE SIGN ADVERTISING THEM. Put a sign on the door that says sorry, shake machine broken. Try anything other than being nasty. There was nobody in sight. No one in the dining area, nobody in the drive-thru. I am your one and only customer and your only job was to make me happy. YOU FAILED ARBY’S! End rant.

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Zero Support!

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pulling hair out     It’s no surprise that I am technically challenged. So, in order for me to have a website, I have to use one of these programs that does all of the html coding for you. But, they never seem to work right. I spend hours trying to arrange things the way I want. Last night, I was trying to add a blog onto my site. It wasn’t working out too well to say the least. The damn drop and drag buttons wouldn’t respond and I just kept ending up with a big blank space on the front of my webpage. That wasn’t the look I was going for. So, I look up the info on who to contact for help. On their webpage it says for support, contact support@weebly.com. I promptly send them and email explaining the problem and begging for help. This is the response I get:  Please note that we don’t accept support requests sent to our support@weebly.com email address. So, what kind of support is that?? Then the message says this: But if you go to help.weebly.com you can submit a help ticket or chat live with one of our support agents to get immediate help. Sounds good, I go there for my live chat so I can receive “immediate help”. There is no live chat available, not even a place to request such a thing. There is the email address listed above, so I am back at square one. It is amazing I have any hair left on my head…

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Doing The Right Thing

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conscienceangel     I read this morning that a man in New York found Tom Hanks’ credit card and returned it. Tom thanked him on Twitter for his millions of fans to read. Again, how come this stuff NEVER happens to me?? The only thing I have found lately is a buck that somebody forgot in the change return at the self checkout. Here’s what happened:

My daughter and I were doing some grocery shopping. I always use the self checkout because I think it will be faster (it never is but, I am delusional). We get up to the register and I notice that someone had forgotten their change, it was only $1. The devil on one shoulder said “C’mon, it isn’t much and they won’t be back for it. Put it in your pocket.” The angel on the other shoulder said “Now Jolene, you know that money isn’t yours, it would be stealing. Turn it in.” As I was debating, an angry, heavyset woman with no nametag and onion breath came over and said “What’s the problem here?” I replied “Nothing, but someone forgot their change.” I handed her the dollar and she stuffed it in her pocket (her angel is obviously non-existent).

Oh well, I proceed on and of course my daughter has picked out something with no tag on it. I knew the price so I got the pissed off woman to come back over. She is really irritated now. I said “This is $3.99 but there is no tag to scan.” She says “Well, there is nothing I can do. Go get another one!” So, I sent my daughter to pick out a replacement but now I am irritated too. Then, the pop that is “on sale” rings up full price. I couldn’t even deal with her again so I just let it slide. So, it ended up costing me $3 more, an extra 10 minutes and, I got a side dish of attitude. Next time that dollar is going right in my purse. Maybe one day I will find a $10 or $20. I can dream big…

http://www.msn.com/en-us/movies/news/man-finds-tom-hanks-credit-card-on-nyc-street-returns-it/ar-AA9JnCr?ocid=HPCDHP

 

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Press 1 For English. What Do I Press For Human??

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robotGetting on the phone and trying to talk to ANY customer service department is a huge pain in the ass. I dread every minute of it because my time is limited and my patience is quite thin. Nonetheless, today I was forced to call in a payment. I thought ok, I will just use the automated system and it will only take a few minutes. Ha, Ha. First of all, I live in the United States, why do I have to press 1 for English?? My call with the robot didn’t go so well. Here are the highlights:

The Robot: “Welcome, how can I help you today?”
Me: “I would like to make a payment.”
The Robot: “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”
Me: “Make a payment!”
The Robot: “I didn’t quite catch that, did you say change your service?”
Me: “No!”
The Robot: “Ok, how can I help you?”
Me: “MAKE A PAYMENT!!”
The Robot: “Ok, I can help you transfer your service.”
Me: “No! Can I talk to a customer service rep?”
The Robot: “I’m sorry you’re having trouble. Would you like to talk to a specialist?”
Me: “Yes!”
The Robot: “Ok, goodbye.”

Then, the robot hung up on me. I had to call in two more times just to get one stupid payment made. I see automatic payments in my future. Either that or the robot gets it.

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I’ll Take A Box!

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empty box It’s happened again. Another Wal-Mart experience that makes me want to drink large amounts of alcohol. I know what you’re thinking. Why doesn’t that damn woman just stop shopping there? I wish I could. But, I am weak. I have a wide range of items to purchase, desire a deal and I am packing a 30 lb. kid with me everywhere I go. I admit it, I NEED the convenience. I don’t however need the bullshit. That is an added benefit I receive for free.

I only have about an hour before my older daughter gets home from school. So here I am, hauling ass up and down the aisles. I am basically just throwing crap in the cart. Get it done and get out of there! I get to the check out and ask the cashier if I need to lift the 2 cases of pop I have loaded underneath the cart. He is all put out when he replies “I guess I can scan it.” Whatever. I finally get out of there, arrived home and realized I paid almost $8 for an empty box that was supposed to contain filters for my fish tank. Have you ever paid $8 for an empty box?? Now I feel like a real dumbass. I bet that cashier had a good laugh. That will teach me for expecting average customer service.

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Another Store, Another Crappy Experience

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D- Surprise! Wal-Mart didn’t make my list today! But, Jo-Ann Fabrics and Michaels have. I visited both yesterday looking for some craft items I needed to finish a project for an article I have been working on. As luck would have it, my daughter fell asleep right before I got there so I am packing dead weight around with me. Admittedly, I probably didn’t start off in a great mood. It got worse.

There are no carts when I arrive at Jo-Ann’s so I proceed to search the aisles with my arm ready to break off from carrying my daughter. I am NOT here to browse so, I gladly accept help when an employee asks me if I need it. I reply “Yes, I am looking for leather.” She gives me a look of curiosity and says “Leather??” like it was unheard of. I said “Yes, leather.” (I am just trying to make a drum, nothing kinky is going on). She stares at me again and says “All we have is over there.” as she points to what I guess is West. Of course all they have are very small patches that won’t work for what I need and cost $12.99 each. Great, now I will have to drive across town to another craft store. I get to the counter and the clerk asks me “Did you find everything you need?” I said “No, but I guess I found everything you have.” The other clerk asked what I didn’t find. I said “leather pieces.” Again, with the dirty look. Not once did any of these people offer an alternative to where I could find some. Ok, moving on.

I get to Michaels and I am still packing the kid so I decide to just ask at the front if they have what I need. I ask the 19 yr. old clerk if they have leather. She looks up and says “Do you SEE that sign that says woodworking?” I say “Yes, but I assumed that was you know, wood.” She replies “Well, it’s back along that wall somewhere. What do you need it for, leatherwork?” No, I thought I would use it to frost a cake. I finally find what I need and have to wait in a long line to pay the same girl for my stuff. She stares at the load I am packing and asks “Does she get heavy?” Nope, not at all. I was hoping to stand in line for another 20 minutes or until my arm falls off. I love clueless kids. The crappy customer service continues…

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Something’s Fishy!

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fish Just in case they missed my last few complaints, here is another one. Dear Wal-Mart: You suck, jackass! So, I am at the store yesterday afternoon with my two girls. Just grabbing a few groceries but then, decided to take a quick peek at the fish. My older daughter asked if we could get a couple of new goldfish to add to our tank. I agree and start the mad hunt to find an employee that will help.

My younger daughter is riding in the cart, diaper is nearing full capacity and the bottle has just run dry. Needless to say, I don’t have a ton of time but, how long could it take to grab a couple of goldfish?? I head to the Photo Center, No One is in sight. I head to the Fabric Desk, No One is in sight. I walk back past the Photo Center and find a person trying to escape into the back. I say “Hey, is there someone who could help us with a few fish?” She says, “I guess I could call someone.” I go and wait like a dumbass. Nobody shows. Many employees walk by but none of them will even make eye contact. I think screw it, let’s just leave. Then, my oldest daughter gives me the puppy dog eyes so I figured I would try one more time. I go to Electronics and find 4 young guys behind the counter. Two are on their cell phones and the other two are bragging about their “bitchin’ weekend”. One of them glances up and asks, “Do you need something?” I said “Yes! I need fish and, a person WITHOUT an attitude. Is there anyone here who can throw some goldfish into a bag so I can go home?” He gives me a crusty look but replies “I will send someone ma’am, just go over there and wait.” So I do, again. Waiting…Waiting… Finally a guy comes and helps us even though he wasn’t on the clock yet (he just happened to be walking by and I pounced on him). I said “What would happen if I just helped myself? It seems to be self-serve.” He just laughed.

Ok. Making progress. We get to the checkout counter. Then, we notice water is shooting out of the bag with the fish in it. The cashier asks rudely, “Do you live out of town?” I replied “No, but I don’t live next door!” She says it will be fine and just throws the leaking bag of fish into a plastic sack. Then, rings them up and we were charged for the wrong kind of fish and double the price! I complain. She says there is nothing she can do about it and I said, “Well, isn’t that convenient.”

I drive like a crazed cabbie to get the fish home before they croak. We made it and they lived through the night so I am hoping for the best. Wal-Mart, if you don’t want to sell fish, don’t! Oh, and split up those pretty boys in the Electronics section…

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