Something’s Fishy!


fish Just in case they missed my last few complaints, here is another one. Dear Wal-Mart: You suck, jackass! So, I am at the store yesterday afternoon with my two girls. Just grabbing a few groceries but then, decided to take a quick peek at the fish. My older daughter asked if we could get a couple of new goldfish to add to our tank. I agree and start the mad hunt to find an employee that will help.

My younger daughter is riding in the cart, diaper is nearing full capacity and the bottle has just run dry. Needless to say, I don’t have a ton of time but, how long could it take to grab a couple of goldfish?? I head to the Photo Center, No One is in sight. I head to the Fabric Desk, No One is in sight. I walk back past the Photo Center and find a person trying to escape into the back. I say “Hey, is there someone who could help us with a few fish?” She says, “I guess I could call someone.” I go and wait like a dumbass. Nobody shows. Many employees walk by but none of them will even make eye contact. I think screw it, let’s just leave. Then, my oldest daughter gives me the puppy dog eyes so I figured I would try one more time. I go to Electronics and find 4 young guys behind the counter. Two are on their cell phones and the other two are bragging about their “bitchin’ weekend”. One of them glances up and asks, “Do you need something?” I said “Yes! I need fish and, a person WITHOUT an attitude. Is there anyone here who can throw some goldfish into a bag so I can go home?” He gives me a crusty look but replies “I will send someone ma’am, just go over there and wait.” So I do, again. Waiting…Waiting… Finally a guy comes and helps us even though he wasn’t on the clock yet (he just happened to be walking by and I pounced on him). I said “What would happen if I just helped myself? It seems to be self-serve.” He just laughed.

Ok. Making progress. We get to the checkout counter. Then, we notice water is shooting out of the bag with the fish in it. The cashier asks rudely, “Do you live out of town?” I replied “No, but I don’t live next door!” She says it will be fine and just throws the leaking bag of fish into a plastic sack. Then, rings them up and we were charged for the wrong kind of fish and double the price! I complain. She says there is nothing she can do about it and I said, “Well, isn’t that convenient.”

I drive like a crazed cabbie to get the fish home before they croak. We made it and they lived through the night so I am hoping for the best. Wal-Mart, if you don’t want to sell fish, don’t! Oh, and split up those pretty boys in the Electronics section…

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